What do I have to do to take a fire particle system and make it able to be fired by the player and destroy objects?
a particle system can be attached to any GameObject… to be able to fire said game object, use Instantiate:
http://unity3d.com/support/documentation/ScriptReference/Object.Instantiate.html
To destroy the object hit, you would use OnCollisionEnter or OnTriggerEnter:
http://unity3d.com/support/documentation/ScriptReference/Collider.OnTriggerEnter.html
I suggest looking over the getting started tutorials, probably would answer some of your questions