Hi Kripto289,
Sorry to hear about your bad experience.
Performances will also strongly depend on what full screen effects are active.
In HDRP, we have default settings which setup post processing effects by default. It is a new paradigm for Unity, so if you are not aware of them, verify them in Edit>Project Settings>HDRP Default settings.
We have recently changed the default values to be more appropriate to console range hardware by default, as well as replaced the default template which was not ideally setup, with a new one mentioned above by Grimreaper358.
We are continuously working on performance and quality improvement, so I would really recommend using the 2020 version with HDRP 10.2 which is in Beta but we are getting close to release.
HDRP is radically different from built-in renderer with some plugins. It is entirely designed for advanced physically based rendering, with support for advanced physical materials (Lit, Layered Lit, Stacklit, sub surface scattering, anisotropy, tesselation, transluency, fabric, hair, refraction,…), advanced lighting features (Light layers, tinted shadows, high quality shadows, decals, advanced reflection and refraction probes blending modes, planar reflections,screen space reflections, transparency management,…), and post processing effects (Color grapding, depth of field,…).
The HDRP development team is very pasionnate, professional and dedicated and some users could get amazing results with HDRP. Give us a chance! 
Here are pretty nice results in ArchViz:
(and good enough performances to run HDRP in VR)
And really cool cinematics:
We are aware of issues on DX12 which is why it is still in preview. Some of them should be already improved in 2020.
Others still need some work. The reason why it is taking time, is that in DX12 things which were optimized inside drivers in DX11 have to be implemented in Engine side, and with our broad range of platform and graphics API versions and devices support, it far from being an easy task.
Note: Our real-time raytracing support is also partly still in preview for this reason.
We are very interested to get your feedback and welcome bugs submitted with “simple” reproduction scenes if you experience performance issues between DX11 and DX12.